


Love You To The Thousandth Planet And Back

by pond_skater



Category: FTL - Fandom, Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I haven’t decided yet, I love FTL, M/M, Or MCR, Seriously idek wtf this is, Sweet Geesus what the fuck is this, actually it kind of is, also if I need more characters the pilot boys will show up!!, and if u like it tell me so I can write more, but in the FTL!verse, but mostly ryden, dw you don’t need FTL knowledge to read this fic, i love ryden, i thought ryden n FTL would be cool, if this flops it never happened lol, ill explain it all don’t worry, im not even joking, its ryden, it’s not, pls read this, this is the most ambitious crossover in history, which is like spaceships n shit, with some peterick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-08-23 02:45:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16610402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pond_skater/pseuds/pond_skater
Summary: Ryan fucking hates this new kid - who is he to march onto his ship and take over his position as captain?Or, the FTL and Ryden crossover that never should've been created.





	Love You To The Thousandth Planet And Back

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Look, I'm a huge FTL nerd. I fucking love the game and I fucking love Ryden, so I thought 'hey, why not combine the two?' It's a ridiculous idea, but let's see how it turns out...
> 
> (You don’t need FTL knowledge to read this, by the way)
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot. Don't sue me, please, my parents will kill me.
> 
> IMPORTANT NOTE:
> 
> For all of y’all who don’t play FTL, lemme explain what “jumping” is real quick because that’s mentioned a lot. Jumping is how to get to places - basically, there are “beacons” scattered throughout the galaxy and to get from one place in the galaxy to another, you have to jump from your current beacon to one close by.

To make a long story short, Ryan was pissed.

How fucking _dare_ this little shit waltz onto his spacecraft, his baby, and take over his position as captain. Sure, his skill card had proven that he had a higher piloting level than Ryan - but still! Ryan had manned his ship, _Septemtrionis Imber_ (although everyone called her just _Imber_ ), for _seven entire fucking years_ \- and suddenly, in less than a minute, he was demoted to manning the door system.

The fucking door system.

"Look, Ryan." Jon had tried reasoning with him. "I hate to break it to you, but since Brendon has better piloting skills than you, we're more likely to survive this mission. And if we survive, you can fly _Imber_ all you want - no one'll ever have to pilot her again but you."

"I don't fucking care!" Ryan had fumed. "This is the most important mission anyone in the Federation's ever been assigned! And _I_ was appointed captain of it, not this stupid hotshot."

Unfortunately for Ryan, Spencer had stepped in at that precise moment and sided with Jon. And whatever Spencer said, went. Spencer was the most reasonable out of the three - if it hadn't been for his lack of piloting skills, Spencer definitely would've been the one piloting _Imber_. Not that Ryan would ever tell him that.

Now Ryan was standing in the tiny doors room, bored out of his mind. There was nothing to do in here -

"Ryan, Pete's started another freaking fire in the engines room. He's evacuating to the med bay - open the doors and leak all the oxygen out of the engines room before the system's destroyed," Jon laughed, slightly.

\- besides open/close the occasional goddamn door. Ryan sighed audibly. He hated this. For fucks' sake, _he_ bossed people about, not the other way around.

"Roger that." He opened the doors grudgingly and waited for the oxygen to leak out so that the fires could extinguish. Had this been someone else's ship and they weren't on a quest to save the galaxy, he'd have waited for the fires to destroy the engines system before opening the doors, just to further prove his distaste at being demoted.

Pete returned to his position in the engines room once the fires were extinguished and there was a safe amount of oxygen in the room. Ryan was about to ask if they could get the fuck going now, when the new kid's - Brandon? - annoying, chipper voice came through Ryan's headphones: "Great teamwork everyone, for all working together to extinguish the fire! I'm so proud of you all."

Ryan rolled his eyes. The fuck? "Yeah," he responded, sarcasm dripping from his voice. "Everyone was _so_ helpful. Spencer nor Patrick nor you fucking did anything!"

There was a pause. "We were giving you...moral support. Right Spencer, Patrick?" Brandon offered.

"No. No, we weren't," Spencer replied.

"Oh. Well, at least I was!"

Ryan rolled his eyes again. "Can we get going now? We've wasted so much time here, the rebels probably caught up with us by now."

"They have?! Shoot, let's go!" Brandon exclaimed, gunning the ship's FTL (the engine).

"Brandon, it was a -"

"My name's Brendon!"

"Whatever, _Brendon_. As I was saying, it was a joke."

"Hey, could you guys shut the fuck up and can we fucking jump?" Jon's voice rang through Ryan's headphones.

"Yeah, yeah, sorry!" Brendon's tone sounded nervous. "Okay, so there's five possible locations we can jump to, where do you want to go? There's one right -"

Ryan was really getting impatient with this little fucker now. Brendon may have great piloting skills, but leadership skills? Not so much. "Brendon, you're the fucking captain. _You_ get to pick. It's up to you to make a decision - we trust you to make the right choice. If you lead us somewhere bad and put us in a nasty situation - it's on you." Perhaps the last part wasn't necessary, but Ryan wanted to make Brendon sweat a little.

"Oh okay, it's just that on my last ship, someone else always told me where to jump, and -"

"I don't care! Fucking jump!"

"Fine!"

They jumped to another beacon. Ryan really hoped Brendon hadn't picked a beacon that was shrouded by nebula - he hated not being able to see anything.

...

"Alright guys, we're here!" Brendon said cheerfully, his voice crackling in Ryan's headphones.

"Brendon, we're aware," Patrick answered. "This spaceship literally flies faster than light, you know...?" Patrick's voice faded away. "Uh, guys?"

"What?" Pete asked.

"...Do you realise what's going on right now?"

"Patrick, _you're_ the one manning the cameras, so no. I swear, if there's another freaking Mantis on board, I'm gonna lose my shit."

"Look outside, dipshit. You don't need cameras for that."

Ryan peered outside, curious. "Oh my god."

"Yup," Patrick rejoined. 

"We're stuck in an ion storm."

Fucking Brendon.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this story is fucking stupid lmao...but if you liked it, please let me know!! I’ll write more if anyone wants it :))
> 
> Thank you for reading and have a lovely day.


End file.
